Monday, November 22, 2010

Monday, Monday! Chapter 14, part 2

What a Monday! I drug myself out of bed early, packed up my computer and my croaking wooden frogs, and went down to Salk Elementary School where a writer friend teaches all the fourth graders writing. We had so much fun, but three hours of non-stop talking to nine-year-olds took all my creative strength. I tell you I had to force myself to write this post. If it weren't for you guys, I would not have got this done. Which is good. Actually, it's great. Deadlines motivate me. Thanks for making me accountable. And then I signed on again and read all your sweet, sweet comments. I LOVE YOU, TOO!!

I'm working on a project that I'm going to invite all of my SING ME TO SLEEP readers to be a part of. It's going to be so exciting. I hope to get things pulled together by tomorrow to announce it. Watch for that.

And at lunch, I snuck out of the school and headed for the post office to mail out bookmarks. If you don't get some in a week or so, email me. Maybe I don't have your address. International letters will take a bit longer than that. If you have no idea what I'm talking about, click on the "bookmarks" tab!

Okay. Business is done. Here's what you've waited all weekend for--the second half of Chapter 14. Leesie and Kim's chat actually serve as what we call in the biz an "info dump." Something we try to avoid, but sometimes necessary. When you put information in dialogue or create a scene to convey the info, it's far more palatable to the reader than paragraphs of simply telling. I am just telling here. But when you couch telling in dialogue, it feels more like "revealing," even when you're playing catch up like I am.

I tried to clear up some of the hanging threads that you, my kind reader/editors, pointed out.

LEESIE HUNT / CHATSPOT LOG / 06/01 3:21 PM

Leesie327 says:  He won’t leave my side, and I like it.
Kimbo69 says:  How’s he managing that?
Leesie327 says: Took the rest of the week off.
Kimbo69 says:  They let him?
Leesie327 says: Everybody owes him shifts. He’s been working too hard.
Kimbo69 says:  You guys ever heard of the balance?
Leesie327 says: Maybe I should lose all hope more often.
Kimbo69 says:  Hardly balanced! You know Michael isn’t your only hope.
Leesie327 says:  Thanks, Kim. I know I can count on you.
Kimbo69 says:  I talked to your dad again. He says, “Hi.”
Leesie327 says:  I didn’t say you could call him!
Kimbo69 says:  He called me.
Leesie327 says:  You didn’t spill anything, did you?
Kimbo69 says: I was so tempted. But that’s your job, my friend.
Leesie327 says: I don’t want to talk about it.
Kimbo69 says:  Well, you better think about it.
Leesie327 says: I’m not thinking about anything ever again.
Kimbo69 says:  Leesie’s getting lazy!
Leesie327 says:  I’m healing—it takes a lot of energy.
Kimbo69 says: So what have you guys been doing with all this time together?
Leesie327 says: Michael slept in today. I sat on the floor and watched his face.
Kimbo69 says: Riveting.
Leesie327 says: It was! I had to tear myself away to make him Gram’s gooey cinnamon French toast.
Kimbo69 says: Gosh, that sounds good. Mail me some.
Leesie327 says: Sure thing. We sat on the balcony and ate it look out at the ocean. If diamonds were turquoise it would be this water.
Kimbo69 says:  Aquamarines?
Leesie327 says: Something like that. We talked about Suki.
Kimbo69 says: [Insert loud choking sounds here!!] Oh, my gosh—did he finally fess up?
Leesie327 says: Yup.
Kimbo69 says:  The creep.
Leesie327 says:  No—don’t say that. He was a hero.
Kimbo69 says: For getting it on with a professional?
Leesie327 says: She enticed him—you saw how gorgeous she is—and he admitted he was tempted, but even though I shoved his ring back in his face like a stupid brute, he didn’t do it. He had my ring around his neck. It stopped him.
Kimbo69 says: You believe him?
Leesie327 says: A hundred percent.
Kimbo69 says: But they were kissing. The whole world saw the photo.
Leesie327 says: The creep she was with beat her up, and Michael took care of her—helped her get back to her people. The Sea Gypsies. She kissed him good-bye. Isn’t he amazing?
Kimbo69 says:  Are you sure he’s not making that up to make himself look good? Wanted to do a prostitute doesn’t shine in my book.
Leesie327 says: No way. I had to pry the story out of him. Now I can tell our kids their dad’s a hero. He saved me, too, you know. Don’t forget that.
Kimbo69 says: You’re having kids?
Leesie327 says: Lots of them.
Kimbo69 says: You going to start that right away?
Leesie327 says: Why not? I can’t go back to school from here.
Kimbo69 says: He won’t let you go back?
Leesie327 says: He’d take me back in a second. I can tell he wants to bring it up, but he’s afraid I’ll flip out again.
Kimbo69 says: So you’re going to stay in Cayman and have babies?
Leesie327 says: I’ll go wherever he wants to and have babies.
Kimbo69 says: You’re too young.
Leesie327 says: When my mom was pregnant with Stephie, my grandmother always said, “Young bodies are made for making babies.” She’d look straight at me and say, “Don’t wait until you’re over the hill. Have them in your twenties.”
Kimbo69 says: You’ve got a good decade or more reproduce then.
Leesie327 says: But a baby with Michael’s eyes would be so cute.
Kimbo69 says: And your life would be over.
Leesie327 says: Or just beginning.
Kimbo69 says: How twisted can you be? The goal is always not to get pregnant, hon.
Leesie327 says: Not always.
Kimbo69 says: Are you trying to tell me you’re knocked up? That was fast.
Leesie327 says: No chance of that.
Kimbo69 says: Still?
Leesie327 says: We made a truce. I promised to stop trying to get him into bed.
Kimbo69 says: Crap—he is a hero.
Leesie327 says: Yeah. He’s guarding my useless virtue.
Kimbo69 says: What did he promise?
Leesie327 says: To find out how to get married on Cayman.

10 comments:

  1. Yaaaayyy:) I am so glad you posted this!! I was waiting for it all day! Glad for the Leesie and Michael reunion. Sad that she still doesn't want to warm up to her family. But I'm sure she'll come around. All of this food mentioning is making me hungry...always mention the yummy food. I love Kim. She's very understanding abnd I'm glad she's starting (attempting) to see Michael in a new light. Another great chapter!! I missed them together. Glad they have finally resolved their differences:)

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  2. Yay... maybe a wedding soon!!!!!
    love it, love it
    i am so glad they are talking again!
    keeps me on the edge of my seat
    sr

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  3. I'm glad that that Michael and Leesie are communicating better, but I'm also so sad for Leesie's family. How worried they must be!

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  4. Really, really good! How long would it be in pages from Leesie finding the clothes in Michael's bag to this point? I'm just wondering if things end up fine, for this problem, too quickly? I could be wrong though.

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  5. I'm so glad that Michael told Leesie about Suki, and that she believes him. Can't wait for more!

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  6. You're right, Jo. The resolution of this problem comes quickly. But this is a minor speed bump compared to what's to come! Let's sit back, relax, and let them enjoy one another for a few chapters. It won't last. Sorry.

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  7. Yaaay! I know that sounds wrong, but I like me some conflict! :)

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  8. The way you structure this, it isn't like info dump :)

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